I have an embarrassing confession that I hope someone will relate to. I’m totally happy to introduce myself to anyone randomly online through LinkedIn, Twitter, email or whatever as I always like to network and connect with like-minded marketing peeps. Then, I go to networking events, and I totally clam up.
I absolutely dread those “networking” hours interspersed between seminars. It’s weird: if someone approaches me, I’m completely friendly and at ease. But the thought of approaching someone on my own at one of these things terrifies me. Even the thought of approaching someone I have spoken to online sometimes freaks me out.
It’s very inconsistent with how I normally am. I was a waitress, my tips depended on my ability to schmooze…with strangers. Before I got this job, I was Little Miss Informational Interview, seeking out one-on-one conversations…with strangers. At a bar, I’m a wingman, grabbing guys and telling them to dance with my friends…grabbing strangers.
Am I just socially awkward IRL? Why is it that at conferences I get intimidated? Why is it that at a time when my game face should most definitely be on, I’m off?
I admitted this fear for the first time to my boss/mentor when we were discussing our networking strategy for an awards event. This bit of advice stuck: remember that everyone is there to network and talk to random people. It’s not like you’re at the mall or the gym and it’s unexpected (and possibly unwelcome) for you to go up to someone and strike up a conversation. Literally, the point of these events is to go up to people you don’t know, tell them your name, chat them up, and make a connection.
Obvious, right? But no one had laid it out like that for me before. Any lightbulbs going off out there?
4 responses so far ↓
Pauley // November 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm |
I’m exactly the same way. Contacting random people online doesn’t bother me much at all, but I, for some reason, resist making in-person or phone connections to people I don’t already know. I’ll try to remember your boss’s advice.
Kyle Clark // November 18, 2009 at 8:23 pm |
Makes sense, but its still awkward to toss yourself on someone randomly.
That’s why MOS (man on the street) soundbites are the worst thing about being a journalist.
My greatest career goal is to avoid getting random people soundbites. Yours should be avoiding networking events. No doubt both of our careers would be well served by that approach.
fisherjanet // November 19, 2009 at 2:48 pm |
Haha oh Mr. Clark. I remember you once told me that PR was slutty.
Kyle F. Reinson // November 25, 2009 at 3:01 pm |
This blog “rocks.” I have to say that it is difficult to talk to people in group networking settings or on the phone when online notes are so easy. No busy ring tones or voice mails to leave and you completely leave the option of a reply open without getting your feelings hurt if people forget about you for a year or two. Most of my best friends are those I know I can always call, but rarely do. We miss Janet here at Fisher for sure.